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37 Questions to ask before starting a consensual non-monogamous relationship

13/3/2019

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swinger signs to find out if you are ready
Are you ready to swing?

Discuss with your partner before considering swinging

Although every relationship is different, a few common factors may help to determine if you and your partner are ready for a consensual non-monogamous relationship (CNM), such as swinging, polyamory or open relationships.  Swinging, may often have more sexual focus than other forms of CNM, rarely does this means the rules are thrown out the window. Before starting any type of CNM, it's important to have a deepened discussion with your partner about your relationship, your fantasies, the swinger myths, the pro and cons, your boundaries, fears, jealousy and more...

The following questionnaire is not a full covered checklist, neither would a couple need to answer positively for each question, but a majority of "Yes" answers may mean you're both on the same page and at least curious or maybe ready to try out swinging.

37 Top Signs to find out if you and your partner are ready to swing

  1. Are you deeply in love with each other?
  2. Do you know each other well like best friends?
  3. Do you trust each other?
  4. Do you tend to handle life's issues together?
  5. Do you make up easily?
  6. Do you express yourself freely and can talk about your feelings, fears, secrets and limits?
  7. Do you share honest opinions to each other?
  8. When you argue, do you remain on topic?
  9. Do you like to dress sexy or do you enjoy watching your partner in sexy outfits?
  10. Do you have a high sexual appetite?
  11. Do you have a vigorous sex life with each other?
  12. Do you often change sex positions and try new things?
  13. Do you use sex toys together?
  14. Do you ever role play in bed?
  15. Do you like dirty talk or texting?
  16. Do you enjoy watching porn together?
  17. Do you know and accept that your partner watches porn without you?
  18. Do you fantasize about sex with others?
  19. Do you share your sexual fantasies with your partner?
  20. Do you freely comment about the attractiveness of other people in each other's presence?
  21. Do you sometimes enjoy flirting with others with your partner's consent?
  22. Do you discuss what other couple's sex lives might be like?
  23. Do you become turned on by the idea of having sex in front of other people? (exhibitionism)
  24. Do you fantasize seeing others having sex in front of you? (voyeurism)
  25. Do you admire single sexually active men and women who own their sexuality?
  26. Do you imagine your partner having a variety of sexual experiences with someone other than you?
  27. Do you become turned on by the idea of your partner having sex with others?
  28. Do you adapt to new settings and experiences?
  29. Do you like to travel?
  30. Do you like adventures?
  31. Do you like romance?
  32. Do you trust that your sexuality does not negatively influence your own personal spirituality?
  33. Do you believe that your partner could very easily be attracted to people who do not look and act like you?
  34. Do you accept and support the idea that your partner could be attracted to people who do not look and act like you without jealousy?
  35. Do you accept without judging for who or what your partner might be turned on by?
  36. Do you accept that you do not "possess" your partner or their physical body?
  37. Do you accept the way that your relationship may change, both for good or for bad?​
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